…films, books, magazines, social networking sites - Vampires f—ing everywhere!

A few weeks ago I was oblivious to the emergence of vampires in pop culture so when, right before boarding a 10 hour flight to Amsterdam, I ran into a vampire book by one of my favorite authors, Christopher Moore, I snatched it up without hesitation.*

This book that I crossed paths with and purchased is called You Suck:  A Love Story**, and isn’t about your typical Anne Rice or Stephanie Meyer style vampires. Think more hipster/binge drinkin’/hooker loving vampires as opposed to the lovelorn, romantic variety.  The standout for me is how a 40-something male author can write the spot-on character of a 16 year old wiseass goth/emo girl with vampire aspirations.  It’s truly remarkable.

So if you want a different vampire read, I recommend picking up You Suck: A Love Story, it’s an irreverent tale that will make you laugh out loud and possibly piss your pants, all while getting your pop culture vampire fix.***

Regards,
H

*I had only read one of his books, but it was enough to make him one of my favorites. The name of the book is Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal.  It’s amazing, absurd and you should read it.

**Unbeknownst to me, this book picks up where his previous, Bloodsucking Fiends, left off.

***I’m well aware that the word “vampire” was used 12 times in this post, I apologize.

Here we are again kids… time to learn about a band that you SHOULD know about if you weren’t too busy watching your Tivo reruns of American Idol or Americas next top blah blah blah. I’m staying in San Diego for the time being - there is some REALLY good music coming out of San Diego right now. Here are my good friends Get Back Loretta

Ketamine - Get Back Loretta

Drugs are bad MMMMKAAYYY

In the spirit of full disclosure I have to admit that I’m a bit biased. These are good friends of mine but it doesn’t change the fact that they’re some of the funniest dudes I’ve met. Check out their MySpace site to see some home made videos:

www.myspace.com/getbackloretta

The triathlon wasn’t too bad but I did have some issues. There is a 1 mile swim - my time was 21:19. My first transition area(from swim to bike) was 3:00. The bike is 24.5 miles - my time was 1:34:35 (see #3 below). My second transition area (from bike to run) was 2:21. The run is 6.2 miles - my time was 1:06:56. (see #5 below). The race was fun but I would change some things. Next year, I want to shave 30 minutes off of my time - 2 minutes off the swim, 20 minutes off the bike, and 8 minutes off the run.

1. Get a good night’s sleep. Anxiety kicks in and your mind gets rolling. There is really nothing to worry about if you have trained. But still for some reason I went to bed at midnight and woke up at 1:30. Race start time is 7:10.

2. Music - Most races don’t allow you to wear headphones for safety and insurance reasons. But out of 1200 competitors I saw at least 100 people with headphones. It sucks when you train with music and then have to compete in silence. Next year I will be using my ipod.

3. Road bike - I didn’t think I would care that I road my mountain bike in the race but when the 600th person passed me I started to get a little bit pissed. I probably lost 20 minutes in bike time which would have made #5(below) a non-issue.

4. The Swim - I don’t know what I would change but when 200 people start swimming for the same point in a river, there ends up being a lot of punching and kicking. I guess I just need to swim faster.

5. Running - I was good on the first 1.8 miles, but then the spaghetti dinner (which was prepared by volunteers for 2000 people - probably not the most sanitary conditions) decided to try to find an exit early. At 3.2 miles I finally found a port-a-potty. Next year I should be able to shave at least 10 minutes off of my run time.

Im a big fan of music. That’s a pretty general statement; of course, everyone loves music. There’s so much out there to choose from. We are constantly exposed to cool, new, exciting artists who entertain us with incredible music. Then, there are the artists who never seem to go away. Here is my list of artists that need to leave us alone:

THE ROLLING STONES - You have enough money already. Take off, Wankers.
MILEY CYRUS - I’ve never heard your music, but I know I hate it.
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN - You don’t have to go totally away, just play in New Jersey.
NICKLEBACK - Holy Shit, Nickleback is still a band that people pay to see!
BRET MICHAELS - You suck so much ass. Please leave, and take your makeup with you, pansy.
NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK - My God. I thought we got rid of you, for good, a long time ago.
KISS - BORING
JOURNEY - I stopped believing a LONG time ago.
MOTLEY CRUE - Crue Fest?? More like Suck Fest.
KENNY CHESNEY - Douche in a cowboy hat.
JANET JACKSON - Your ass of a brother has gone under the radar, maybe you should do the same.
BRITNEY SPEARS - You are only around because you looked good about 10 years ago.
KANYE WEST - There isn’t a bigger Douchebag in the entire world. Your music is shit Kanye, and so are you.
DIDDY/PUFF DADDY/PUFFY BITCH/WHATEVER YOUR NAME IS - Ok, I lied, you’re tied with Kanye for the Biggest Douche Award. I didn’t realize people could love themselves as much as you and Kanye do.

This list should in no way be viewed as complete. I could go on and on and on, but I don’t have all day to write this.

posted by bus

If you are down to hear some Swedish Post metal check out Umeå Sweden’s very own Cult of Luna. Their newest album Eternal Kingdom is based on some crazy business.

Cult of Luna’s rehearsal space is located in an old abandoned mental institution and during a rehearsal the band found an old journal written by a former patient Holger Nilsson. In the journal titled “Tales from The Eternal Kingdom” Nilsson blames the death of his wife on some some satanic mythical forest creature that abducted her and drowned her down by the river. Some serious and creepy subject matter!!

Cult of Luna is pimp!! In fact there is a bunch of bands from Umeå that are pimp (Refused, Meshuggah, Khoma, etc…) there must be something in the water over there. Anyway, this album is really good and moody. All the lyrics are taken from the journal and translated into English and howled over the top. It’s bad!! Check it out. If you dig it check out their older stuff too. Especially, Somewhere Along the Highway.

Check the myspace pages for more details on Eternal Kingdom.

http://www.myspace.com/cultoflunaeternalkingdom

http://www.myspace.com/cultofluna

Jon